For a week I prayed that this ultrasound would be reassuring. Specifically, I prayed that I would see the embryo had implanted in the right spot and that there would be a heart beat. At 5 weeks and 6 days, it would be right on the brink for this ultimate sign of life.
In case I would get what I prayed for but nothing else, I continued my prayer, hoping to cover all my bases. "Please let the baby continue growing until I deliver him or her, healthy in November." But I didn't stop there. "And let us raise him or her so he/she can grow until old age."
Then at the end of April we found out that Will would have Down syndrome. But I prayed for a healthy baby, I thought. Surly my prayers had not been answered. So my fledgling attempts at prayer ended a little more than a month after they began. In the seven weeks since then, there has been a sense of suspense while waiting for the results of the anatomy scan.
I can't help but think back to my prayers for a healthy baby. We are certainly not completely in the clear yet. The next big hurdle is a fetal echocardiogram (a detailed ultrasound of the heart) in mid July. But the preliminary findings are there are no major structural issues. He appears healthy.