I prayed. For a week I prayed that this ultrasound would be reassuring. Specifically, I prayed that I would see the embryo had implanted in the right spot and that there would be a heart beat. At 5 weeks and 6 days, it would be right on the brink for this ultimate sign of life.
In case I would get what I prayed for but nothing else, I continued my prayer, hoping to cover all my bases. "Please let the baby continue growing until I deliver him or her, healthy in November." But I didn't stop there. "And let us raise him or her so he/she can grow until old age."
When I went to the appointment, the pregnancy was in my uterus! And there was a newly beating heart! I should have felt relief. And I guess I did for a few minutes. But I found something to worry about. In fact, I would almost call it to fixate on. The embryo measured 2 mm, which seemed small for the age. The ultra sound tech didn't express concern but I left worrying. I worried last night and did some Google searching (never wise). I worried during the night and struggled to sleep. I woke up worried today and hoped I'd have a reassuring message from my doctor after she analysed the images. I waited until noon and then I decided I'd better contact my doctor myself to get her take before I let the worry eat away at me any more.
So, if you're praying, please focus on a continued strong heartbeat and some growing!
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